School Stories

Hey Jammers! Nafaria here.

I'm sure you've all had those days where nothing - and I mean NOTHING - interesting happens at school whatsoever. Most of my days are like that.

Thankfully, I have had a couple of school days that weren't all that boring, and they make for great storytelling. So, today, I thought it would be fun if I shared a few school stories of mine, some of which are pretty embarrassing. With that being said, enjoy!

1. I went to a charter school for most of my elementary years, and at my school, you would have the same teacher for three consecutive years. The grades were split into two different groups: Lower El, which included grades 1-3, and Upper El, grades 4-6.

I was in fifth grade at the time, and my teacher, Ms. Souzzann, had something called Silent Reading Time. It was for a half an hour each day during the afternoon, right after recess. We could read any book we wanted, and we could even grab a pillow or two to be extra comfy.

One day I was dashing as fast as I could to get a pillow (because most people grab them all within the first five seconds that we're back in the classroom), and I guess I had some gas in me from lunch, because as I was running I let out the biggest, loudest fart ever. I quickly tried to get out of the area where I farted so people wouldn't think it was me, but my face was blushing beet red for the entire 30 minutes. In the end, I didn't get my pillow.

2. This next story took place during my fourth grade year, so my teacher was still Mrs. Souzzann. At my charter school, they didn't have a cafeteria. They made us bring our own lunches from home every day, and we would eat them on our own personal placements on our desks in the classroom. We could also heat up our food with a microwave if we wanted to.

Well, one day, I was about to start eating my freshly warmed up Panda Express leftovers from dinner the night before when the fire alarm went off. We didn't get the clear to come back into the building until after our lunch period was over, so I didn't get to eat my Panda Express as early as I had intended to.

Apparently, some little kid, probably a first or second grader, was heating up a corn dog in the microwave out in the hallway, and set the timer for 30:00 instead of three minutes. Yeah, it's probably not a good idea to let children use the microwave unsupervised.

3. When I was in third grade (my teacher being Ms. Nicole), the charter school I went to was in its very first year, so a lot of things were pretty new and small, such as the playground. For about a week or so, some construction workers were putting in some poles for a gate, and the cement where the poles were supposed to go was still wet, so my friend and I carved our initials into the wet cement with a wood chip, and sure enough, the cement hardened, and our intials are still there to this day.

4. I was at a public school for my kindergarten, first, and second grade years. I was in second grade at the time when my baby sister was born, and for some unknown, strange reason, I decided to bring my newborn sibling to school for Show-and-Tell. No, I didn't actually drag her into the classroom with me; my mom came later during the day when it was actually time to do Show-and-Tell. Of course, my sister just sat there, being the chunky lump of chubbiness that she was, and didn't move a muscle. She just looked around like a deer caught in headlights the whole time.

5. Also in second grade, I was on the cover of a newspaper along with my mom, my brother, and my sister. My mom was sitting in an office chair with a telephone up to her ear, my sister was on her lap, my brother tugging on the telephone cord, and I was whispering in her ear. It was a newspaper for moms, if you haven't assumed already, and the main article was about my mom and how she gave up her career to raise a family. It just so happened that my teacher was subscribed to that newspaper, saw me on the front page, brought it to school that day, and showed everyone in my class. I thought I was the coolest kid around, all because a picture of me whispering in my mom's ear was on the front of a newspaper.

6. In sixth grade, I ran for student council, and for my speech I did a rap. It was really, really cringy. My opponent did a parody of the Cup Song, though, and that was pretty cringy as well, but she ended up winning.

7. At my school we had composition notebooks for every subject we studied, no matter how little we actually studied them: math, language, Spanish, history, botany, zoology, and geography. We also had a book for journaling, and we would write a short paragraph or two in them every so often.

I, however, was the odd third grader who used my journaling notebook a lot more than everyone else in the classroom, all because I was writing a big, fat story of mumbo-jumbo that didn't make any sense. I thought it was absolutely hilarious, though, and so did all of my classmates. Sometimes I would even beg my teacher to let me read a chapter out loud to the class, and once or twice, she let me.

One of the scenes I remember being exceptionally funny to young me was something along the lines of this: I was a ramen noodle bowl with eyes and a mouth stuck at a disco party in heaven with Elmo and Megamind. Not knowing I was living, Megamind slurped me up. I squirmed around, hoping I wouldn't fall down his esophagus. I tugged on some ''weird strings'' I had found, which caused Megamind to throw me up. Then I asked him why he had such a large head, and he said it was because he ate a watermelon whole and somehow it went through the wrong tube and got stuck in his skull.

Yeah... I had, erm... quite the imagination...

8. One week during the fall in eighth grade, my family and I took a trip to Disneyland. Naturally, I had a lot of make-up work to do. My idiotic French teacher (who truthfully didn't teach me anything at all) handed me this map of some subways and roads in France, along with a worksheet that corresponded with it. The questions were extremely easy. Most of them were like, ''What color is the subway that starts at Paris and goes to Bordeaux?'' The only problem was that the map was printed out in black and white, so what the heck was I supposed to write down? Dark grey? Medium gray? Light gray? Ugh.

9. Speaking of my French teacher, he was so lazy that one time, he didn't bother preparing a lesson, so he turned on March Madness, put it on the projector, and that's all we did for the entire period. March Madness, my dudes. In French class. At least it was an easy course.

10. Last one for today. In fourth grade, we had to write a research paper on a hominid. I was assigned Ardipithicus. Back then, I thought history was the most boring and worst subject ever, so instead of typing up my research paper, I copied and pasted the entire Wikipedia article on Ardipithicus and handed it in. I didn't have a clue what plagiarizing was yet, though, so you can't really blame me because I didn't know what I was doing was wrong.

Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed some of these stories! Feel free to tell me about your embarrassing/funniest school moments in the comments. Bye!